The Happiest Day of Seto Kaiba's Life
by Sickofwriting
Summary: Seto Kaiba experiences the happiest day of his life. Puppyshipping (Seto/Joey) fanfic. Do not allow any puppies near this fanfic. Tons of referential humor.


**Ore-Sama: This fanfic is entirely based on two sentences that randomly popped into my head: "Marriage? But this is Japan, we can't get married here!" Followed immediately by "Screw the rules, I have money!" And then I decided to make jokes about Kaiba's smile.**

**Warning: Bad referential humour, gay marriage, and rule screwing! Do not allow any puppies near this fanfic!**

**Disclaimer: Some people say that if they owned Yugioh that they wouldn't write Yugioh slash fanfic! Well you know what? I would. I totally would. But I don't own Yugioh, so it's of no relevance.**

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Joey sighed. It had been over two years since he and Seto had been set up together by rabid fangirls. The time when he was with Seto passed by ever so quickly, just like a dream. He started dozing off, and fell asleep on Seto's couch while waiting for his beloved to return home.  
When Seto finally did come home from a late work night, he smiled at the sight of Joey asleep on his couch. His Joey.

**"Duke, the puppy died!" Tristan yelled up the stairs.  
"Oh, let me try healing it with my sexiness!" Duke yelled back, as he ran down the stairs, his theme music growing louder with every step. He came down, and examined the puppy.  
"Is there anything we can do!?" Tristan asked.  
"Nope. At least I'm still sexy..." Duke sighed.**

Seto walked over to the couch, and knelt down next to Joey. He gave him a light peck on the cheek, and whispered "Honey, I'm home." into his ear. Joey opened his eyes, and smiled at what he saw.  
"Welcome home..." Joey yawned. He sat up and rubbed his eyes.  
"Do you want me to make you something to eat?" Joey asked Seto.  
"I'll make dinner tonight. Also... I'm taking the day off tomorrow, so that we can go out on a date then... Is that okay with you?" Seto asked Joey.  
"Of course!" Joey grinned. It had been quite a while since their last date.  
"Alright then!" Seto smiled.

**Somewhere in Egypt, the cries of a loud effeminate villain were heard throughout the land.  
"F-Fluffy! Mr. Woofums died!" Marik cried into Bakura's chest.  
"Mr. Woofums?" Bakura asked.  
"I adopted a puppy the other day and I named him Mr. Woofums! He just died for no reason! What's happening, Bakura!?" Marik started hiccuping  
"Bloody hell! I bet Kaiba smiled. Bloody wanker." Bakura groaned.**

Joey woke up loudly as always. He rolled over, and was greeted by the sight of Seto Kaiba sleeping. He smiled and snuggled as close to Kaiba as he could without disturbing his slumbering lover. Eventually, Kaiba opened his eyes, and smiled at the sight in front of him.

**"Pharaoh! Our puppy just died!" Yugi cried.  
"What!? How!?" Yami replied in shock.  
"I-I don't know, he was just eating his food, and he-" Yugi started to say, but anything he said ****after that was unintelligible thanks to his constant hiccuping, crying, and sniveling.**

"Good morning, pup." Seto said, caressing Joey's cheek.  
"Morning, Seto..." Joey sighed in bliss.  
"So, are we going to get ready for the day, or do you just want to stay in bed all day long?" Seto smirked.

**"Melvin! My puppy is dead!" Ryou Bakura cried.  
"That's because I killed him!" Melvin laughed maniacally.**

"Yeah, yeah..." Joey yawned and stretched. Seto stared at how sexy the display of Joey's muscles was. Joey stood up, stretched a little bit more, then turned to Seto, asking "Where are we going today?"  
"I was thinking we could just spend the day at home, then we could go to a nice restaurant for dinner." Seto answered.  
"Alright. I'll change into nice clothes later." Joey said, and he put on his casual clothes.  
Seto got up and dressed himself in casual clothes- a rare sight with the CEO.  
"Soooooo... What should we do?" Joey asked, scratching his head.  
"Well, we could play a children's card game. On motorcycles!" Seto laughed at the preposterous thought.

**"Ah! Yutsu!" Yusei cried.  
"YUSEI!?" Jack yelled.  
"My puppy just died! NOOOOOOOOO!" Yusei bawled.  
"BUT HOW DID THAT HAPPEN!?" Jack continued yelling. He preferred yelling over talking.  
"Who cares, my puppy is dead!"**

"Yeah, when pigs fly." Joey snorted.  
"Let's play a video game." Seto decided.  
The two decided that since it was the Yugioh universe, parody or not, that they should play a video game about card games. And thus, they played the Pokemon Trading Card Game game. If not for any reason, then merely to mess with people.

"Alright, puppy, it's about time you got ready for our date." Seto said, standing up.  
"Okay." Joey replied, then he headed upstairs to change into his suit. When he went back downstairs, Seto had already changed into a suit.  
"Nyeh? How do you change so quickly?" Joey asked.  
"Because rule 1: Seto Kaiba screws the rules. Including rules pertaining to how long it takes to get dressed."  
"Oh. Nyeh." Joey replied, "Well, shall we go, my love?"  
"Indeed we shall." Seto smiled.

**"NOOOOOOOOOOO! The last puppy... Mira..." Paradox fell to his knees, and began to cry.**

The two lovers went to the restaurant at the Tipton Hotel. Of course, Kaiba being Kaiba, he had a special spot reserved for him and his beloved.  
"Now, I have a special surprise planned..." Kaiba winked at Joey.  
"Nyeh?" Joey asked. The two sat down and ordered. After they finished eating (which was a rather silent affair; Joey was too busy stuffing his mouth to talk, and Kaiba had nothing to say. Nothing that didn't pertain to the Question, that is), the stage curtains began to rise, and Zorc and Cody stepped onto the stage.  
"I'm Zorc, here to destroy the world on a very special day for two people in the audience!" Zorc yelled. Everybody in the audience laughed.  
"Nyeh?" Joey looked weirded out. At that moment, Kaiba got down onto one knee, and presented the jewelry box of doo- that is, eternal happiness.  
"Joey Wheeler, will you marry me?" Seto proposed.  
"But this is Japan! We can't get legally married here!"  
"Screw the rules, I have money!"  
"Of course... Of course I'll marry you!" Joey grinned and allowed Kaiba to put the ring on his finger. The audience burst into applause. This was the happiest moment of Joey's and Kaiba's lives...

**"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about the number of dead puppies?" Nappa asked.  
"IT'S OVER 9000!" Vegeta said, shocked.**

The ceremony was small and simple, with only family and close friends invited, as well as the Blue Peeps Whitey Dragon who served as the minister. Serenity was there, but her mother refused to come to see the ceremony. And suddenly, the dog population was under control.

THE END

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**Ore-sama: Alright, the ending was a bit too rushed, but what do you think? I might write a second chapter if enough people want it, but this was intended to be able to stand on its own. I'm also recruiting Dutch-speaking fangirls to help me learn Dutch! Please PM me! Also, Yugioh has been translated into ebonics! Also, LittleKuriboh is un-banned again.  
**


End file.
